The Devil's Dictionary
Thanks to my better half, I became acquainted with this book, written by Ambrose Bierce.
I will honor it by including some of my favorite quotes from it.
You should read it for yourself – public library or one place to buy it is here.
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Gunpowder
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Gunpowder: An agency employed by civilized nations for the settlement of disputes which might become troublesome if left
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Genealogy
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Genealogy: An account of one’s descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his own.
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Frog
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Frog: A reptile with edible legs.
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Egotist
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Egotist: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
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Diplomacy
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one’s country.
Cabbage
Definition, per Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary: Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man’s head.